Taking Care of Baby as a Job

Rewarding and Depressing

Full-time staying-at-home parent is a tough job. It's rewarding for the most part, but it comes with lots of depressing moments. 

As I've been a stay-at-home parent for the last couple of months, I'll share my experiences. I hope this helps you to figure out why you or your partner is going through such a hardship.   

Rewards

• Bonding Time: You get to spend a great amount of time bonding with your child. The bond created from early childhood sets up for the remaining times. Every time I put my daughter in my arms, I think what a sad life it would have been if I didn't get to do it every day. 
• Witnessing Milestones: Of course, the world has better cameras to record everything, but it's never the same to see it and feel it right there and then. I witnessed my child getting up holding the crib rail by herself. It was truly an amazing experience to see her take the first step forward. 
• Creating Memories: I doubt every now and then, "How much of this will she remember?" Many research say babies remember a lot more than what we'd imagine. I still have some childhood memories or memories of memories that made me happy even when I was in my teens.  I try to give my daughter new kinds of excitement every day hoping it'd create a good memory. 

Depressing Moments

• Isolation: My wife works at home remotely. Even with her around, she is focused on her job mainly, as she should be. A lot of times, I feel isolated and lonely because our baby is too young to engage in social activities. My only outlet is through social media, but I can't be looking at the smartphone around the baby. I go almost all day without having interactions with people. It gets lonely.
• Loss of Identity: I used to work. I used to work with a lot of people. I used to interact with hundreds of people on a daily basis. It was part of who I was. Staying home makes me feel like I've lost my identity and ability to do anything else. I kind of lose sight of my purpose, because it doesn't seem like I'm bearing any fruit. I know that in the long run, it's significant, but not having any constant feedback, I lose track of where I am in my life. 
• Loss of Control: Babies cry. They cry to communicate. Our daughter started to whine a lot more because she now has demands. It's hard to understand, though, what she wants. It makes you feel like you lose control. You don't have a clue what you need to do. 
• Getting Held Up: I used to plan an agenda every day. I might not write them down, but it always revolve around my head. Caring for a baby takes away a lot of time from doing things I thought I'd get done. The list of to-do's calling my brain's attention really stresses me out.

How to Navigate

Navigating the highs and lows of stay-at-home parenting with a baby under one year old requires resilience, support, and self-care. Resilience is difficult to practice and get better. Support from the family needs to be asked. It might not come naturally for all people. 

Self-care is where the most effort could shine the light. First and foremost is to realize that you, the stay-at-home parent, are struggling. Depression slips in unnotified. Set a time, in the morning, lunch, or before going to bed to check your status. See if you can think of anything to be thankful for or something happy. If not, you need to let your family know. Take a break. 

I take my daughter out for walks as much as the weather permits. It helps my daughter to develop, but it also gives me a chance to get some fresh air and clean out my system. Seeing the blue sky and floating clouds makes your day brighter, no matter how old you are. Try!

Remember, only happy parents can raise a happy child.

Infant Safety Helmet Review

 Baby Safety Gear Must

Around the sixth month, most babies start to crawl. It's when all the parents need to baby-proof the house. Covering all the sharp edges and corners of furniture, blocking the unused electric outlets, and locking the draws. 

When our daughter started to crawl, she learned fast. And she crawled very fast too. Sometimes, she couldn't control the weight of her head and fell forward or backward. So, we figured a safety helmet is a must. 

First Attempt: Head Cushion

Head Cushion

We first tried this type of head cushion. Our initial thought was that if she falls forward, she can use her arms and hands to protect the head. We were wrong about it. When she fell in any direction, our baby didn't have any way to protect herself. 

This type of protection wasn't too helpful when she fell forward or sideways. We had to return the product.

Full Head Protection Helmet

Amazon Link: Infant Safety Helmet

This is the one I found on Amazon. We are very satisfied with the product. 

It protects the head all around and is size-adjustable with velcro on the back. 

It also has a strap around the chin to keep it in place. 

Our daughter eventually learned to hold her head up even when falling to avoid her head crashing into things. Still, she sometimes stumbles on stuff and falls on her face or head first. 

She doesn't like to have things fixed on her head, but we always put on the helmet when we leave her to play by herself in the playpen. Those few times we left her without the helmet, she hit her head on the floor hard. So, we make sure to keep it on her.

Baby Safety Helmet Is a Must

The brain is one of the most crucial parts of the body. It is also very weak, especially during the developing stages of early childhood. It must be protected at all times. Babies don't have the neck muscles to control their heads when they first start to crawl. The helmet can be a great protection aid if your baby is active and likes to travel on her own. 

You do need to keep in mind that you can't fasten the helmet too tight on the baby's head. It is harmful to the developing brain. Read the manual carefully and follow the cautions.

Keep your baby's head from any damage!

Harmful Toys for Your Children

 Why Flashing Toys Are Harmful

In the last blog post How to Pick the Best Toys for Your Child, I stated to avoid toys with too many LED flashing functions. In this blog post, let's explore further the reasons why they might be harmful to your children.

Flashing Toys

Flashing toys, with their bright lights and captivating sounds, may seem like a fun choice for engaging young children. However, research and child development experts caution against their use, especially for infants under 12 months old. Here's why flashing toys can be harmful:

1. Overstimulation: Flashing lights and loud noises from electronic toys can overwhelm a baby's developing sensory system. This overstimulation may lead to stress, agitation, and difficulty in focusing.
2. Interference with Development: Instead of fostering natural curiosity and exploration, flashing toys provide excessive stimulation that can interfere with a child's ability to engage in imaginative play and develop essential cognitive skills.
3. Limited Creativity: Flashing toys often dictate play patterns and offer limited opportunities for open-ended, creative play. This can hinder a child's imagination and problem-solving skills. 
4. Attention Span: Continuous exposure to flashy stimuli may contribute to shorter attention spans and decreased ability to focus on tasks, which are crucial skills for learning and development.
5. Language Development: Research suggests that electronic toys with flashing lights and sounds may not support language development as effectively as traditional toys and interactions with caregivers.

Given these concerns, it's best to opt for simpler, more traditional toys that encourage hands-on exploration, sensory development, and imaginative play. These also apply to Media exposure and Cell phone usage by babies. By providing babies with toys that align with their developmental needs, we can foster healthy growth and learning experiences.  Keep it as natural as possible!

How to Pick the Best Toys for Your Child

 Things to Look Out for in Toys

Have I mentioned that the Toy Story series is my favorite movie of all time? I've had a lot of toys when I was a kid. Good fond memories of each one of them. I don't remember much about choosing them on the shelves of Toys R Us. I do remember I played the heck out of those plastics. 

Toys play a crucial role in the development of infants under 12 months old, but selecting the right ones is paramount. Here's a guide to address concerns about toys for this age group:

1. Safety First: Opt for toys that are free from small parts, sharp edges, and toxins. After 6 months, everything they grab goes into their mouth. Keep the play area clean and safe!
2. Stimulation and Sensory Development: Look for toys that stimulate multiple senses, such as colorful rattles, textured balls, and soft plush toys. Try to stay away from the ones with too many LED lights or loud noises. 
3. Motor Skills: Toys like activity mats, play gyms, and stacking rings encourage motor skill development and hand-eye coordination. 
4. Exploration: Provide toys that promote exploration, such as teething rings, crinkle toys, and toys with mirrors. Give your child a space to put their imagination into the plays. A doll without a face forces your child to imagine the facial expressions.
5. Quality Over Quantity: Limit the number of toys to avoid overwhelming the baby and focus on quality toys that offer various developmental benefits. Kids find creative ways to play with toys even if you don't guide them! 
6. Supervision: Always supervise playtime to ensure the baby's safety and intervene if necessary. 

Remember, every child is unique, so observe their interests and reactions to determine which toys best suit their needs. By prioritizing safety and development, you can provide a nurturing environment for your little one's early exploration and learning journey. Keep the curiosity going!

Best Humidifier for Dry Winters, Levoit

Winters Are Dry, Keep It Moist for Your Baby

<This is not a sponsored advertisement. All the comments below are from my experience and my own words.>

For most parts of the U.S., winters get dry. Except for Florida, where it's humid all year long, and California, where it rains a lot during winter.

Babies are sensitive to humidity. It affects their breathing, sleep cycle, and possible disease in the respiratory system. 

It is recommended to keep at least 40 ~ 60% humidity for babies and toddlers. I've found this humidifier that saves a lot of hassles.

Amazon Link to Levoit Humidifier

VeSync Official Website for Levoit Humidifier

Pros

• Large Water Tank
• Digital Display with humidity (Can be turned off during the night)
• Smart Control via App on Smart Phone
• Hot and Cool mist
• Easy to clean
• Quiet
• Target Humidity Setting 

I personally love this product. It's the best humidifier I've ever used so far. 

One thing I was very impressed with when I first filled up the tank was how the drain holes were built. I could see the designers have put a lot of thought into it. My other humidifiers had either unique shapes where I couldn't get my hands into the tank to clean all corners, or the water wouldn't drain completely. It has a large opening on top and holes are built at the very edge to enable complete drainage. 

Smart Control via a smartphone app is very convenient. If I lay down to sleep and forget to turn on the humidifier for my child, I can just use the app to do so. I can set the target humidity, turn off the display to keep it dark, and even have the mist hot or cool. The app has a lot of features like setting a routine or scheduling the operation in advance. 

Cons

• Manually set mist outlet direction
• Bit bulky and heavy (with 6L of water filled)
• Hot mist requires some caution

The cons wouldn't be such a big deal if it wasn't for our children. Getting over the 8-month mark, my daughter stands up pulling on everything. We put the humidifier on top of a small side table, which is at a great height for my daughter to pull on. 

Levoit Humidifier has a sleek design and doesn't feel bulky for holding 6 Liters of water. However, when it comes to having a possibility it might fall on a child is scary. You will need sturdy furniture that is somewhat water-resistant to put the humidifier on. 

Hot mist does get hot, especially near the mist outlet. You need to use caution not to have your child get burned. 

Again, the cons aren't really a big deal as long as you use caution as you should with your children.

Conclusion

It is now priced at $109.99 on both the official website (16% coupon available as of Jan 27, 2024) and Amazon. I think it's worth every penny. The IoT smart technology really saves a lot of hassle. 

If you did so well in putting your child to sleep, you don't want to walk back in there to cause any disruptions to turn on a humidifier. Do it on your phone!

I recommend this product for all families, especially with newborns. 

Happy Moist Sleeping!

Time Passes and It Passes Quick

Reflection on the Past 8 Months 

Every time I look at my daughter, I think 'Wow, she grew a lot.' 

It's not only me thinking. She actually is growing really fast. 

She already outgrew a lot of the clothes she got as a welcome-to-the-world gift. Her crib looks smaller. She keeps on meeting the end of the bed too soon when she crawls. 

My wife and I were worried we'd sprain our back leaning into the crib to put our baby. Now she stands holding the rail. It's already time for the second shift down on the mattress level. 

I've heard many others say that the early days will be missed. 

You will never know the last time you pick up your child. 

We are trying our best to capture all the significant moments on camera. Her first cry, first time trying baby food, first time standing up, and many more. 

It's only been 8 months at the most, but we already started to miss those days. Memories linger by our fingertips as we swipe over each month in the cell phone gallery. 

We know the best thing is the enjoy these moments and not dwell on the past. If good memories like these keep building on, I am sure the rest of the life will be meaningful.  

How to Deal with Emotions Raising a Baby

Emotions, the Greatest Ally and the Biggest Enemy

The biggest emotion I often get as a parent is 'worry.' 

"Is my child on the right developmental track? Am I on the right track? Is she safe? Hungry? Satisfied? What if she feels unloved???"

The desire to 'know it all' has turned into a fear and worry. To avoid having such insecurity, it has turned into greed. This greed makes me want to feed the child and put her to sleep. Get my hands free. The peace, while she sleeps, is the only comfort zone left without any emotions bothering me. 

Emotions: Natural Safety Measures

As you well know, the emotions have kept us safe and evolving throughout history. 

Fear, worry, rage, and anger keep us away from danger. Joy and sadness bring people closer. Amazement lets us continue exploring. 

It's like a natural safety measure. If you haven't seen the movie 'Inside Out,' it's a must-watch with your child (if you are in the stage of partial media allowance, of course). Emotions support our well-being. 

Your child must learn to control his or her emotions. It's going to set the tone for their lives and teach them survival skills. 

Teaching to Allying with Emotions

It's probably one of the most difficult tasks for parents. We feel like we don't even have a full grasp of our emotions. 

The good news is, you don't have to be in full control of your emotions. In fact, that's impossible. 

Your emotions are built not to be under control. You learn some social skills to hide your emotions at times, but if you let your emotions boil inside you for too long, they come and get you. 

We ally with emotions, not in control. We learn to let it out sometimes and hold it in the other times. But, we train ourselves to be honest with ourselves about emotions. 

Let it flow like water, but we build some bridges where needed. 

Some Bad Practices

We make the mistake of controlling our child's emotions for our convenience. We want our child to stop crying, like ever. We want our child to be calm, like always. We want them to be a happy baby if not an emotionless robot. 

We know so well about being sad, we go and clear out the sadness from their inventory of feelings. Having been an experienced anger-er, we go out and fight for our children. 

Of course, the parents must come to attention when the basic life-threatening danger is present. We want the best for our children. We don't want anyone stepping on their foot and not apologizing. 

But, they need to learn their feelings too. They need to figure out what to do when something is done to them wrongfully. 

What Should Parents Do?

The best thing for the parents to teach the children to control their emotions is: WAIT. 

We need to give them room and time. We wait for their small brain to do the magic: recognize, analyze, resolve, and take action. 

Then, we can give them feedback when they ask to or they are ready for it. We don't want to intervene too deep, even if you know what's going on in their head! 

It's tough seeing your little angel struggle. You bit of help can save thousand hours of stressing for your child. We know, we know. But let your child take a step. Trust your child. Give them a chance. 

It's easier said than done. But when you've done it right, you will see your baby grow! Happy waiting!