Happily Ever After: Is it a norm?

Misfortune, Miserable, Unhappy Makes a Good Story

Recently, I heard from two different sources about the same topic that caught my attention and kept me thinking: how people define and treat happiness. 

What used to be called Happiness

There has always been some sort of scarcity for people throughout history. Food, comfort, house, warmth, safety, equality, money, and many others. People always craved for happiness. Happiness that came from fulfilling the scarcity. 

Standards have evolved with time

What we have now isn't perfect. Still, the scarcity of those mentioned is less common for a lot of people, which is a good thing. But surely it had some side effects. It became harder and harder to please people. Eventually, what used to be a happy life has become a norm or even the lowest minimum standard of life. 

Stories That People Aren't Interested In

"Our daughter tried her first ice cream in her life!" 

This type of story doesn't resonate with a lot of people anymore. Family having a good time isn't considered sharing happiness. It's bragging to some people; some think of it very insignificant event that happens all the time. 

It's so basic, too normal, not so special.

Stories That Engage People 

Negative stories stand out. They stick with people more. Parents are sick and tired of taking care of baby, not being able to travel as freely, and how tired they are because their babies kept them up all night.

To the singles, the negativity passes on. It scares them to get married and have kids. The stories develop to divorces not being optional but an absolute necessity. They need to hold even higher standards to select their life-long partner. Actually, they have a lot more fun things to fill in the place of family nowadays. 

Perspective Shift 

My scarcity growing up was family. Beginning my junior year of high school with divorcing parents got me scared of and wanting to have my own family at the same time. When I got married, I was really glad I made that choice (and she accepted). The happiness from getting into a covenant relationship was unimaginable. The negative stories do exist, but they were a mere small portion of it!

Having a child is on another level. Everything, every moment, every second is so special. Same with marriage, there are hardships, but it's just a small bit of this amazing experience. I don't even remember why I was so scared in the first place. 

Conclusion

We have become so overly saturated with the "standards of a happy life." Traveling, Omakase, Gucci bags, Tesla, buying a big house, etc. It's either you imitate and brag, or you are jealous. You want to bring them down somehow by talking all the negative stuff about those who look happy. And you comfort yourself saying you have high standards. 

Maybe your scarcity is in self-awareness. With a loving family, walking to the nearest park holding hands can be the most memorable trip, or your wife's cooking tastes better than the one by Nobu's sushi chef. It's really a cliche, but happiness isn't far. It's as close as your child's first ice cream experience.

Planning a Move with A Baby

Interstate Moving for A Better Environment

We've given some thought to it when it was just us, a couple. Moving interstate isn't easy. It's a big project to manage and has a lot of variables to consider: long-distance moving company vs. U haul truck, vehicle shipping company, flights, what and how to pack, what to do with the appliances, furniture, finding a new job, a new place to live, a good neighborhood, a new social circle, and the list goes on and on. 

Now that we have a baby, the list has gotten much longer with more stuff to pack, the neighborhood needs to be child-friendly, and the new place needs to be a bit bigger, on and on. 

Still, we decided to take a leap of faith to find a better home for our family. It's not the most ideal time of the year, or even a decade, to move. Here are 3 reasons why we think moving to Georgia is better than living in California.

Cement vs. Greens

California is a crowded place. It has a lot of nature to offer, but they are usually about an hour out from where people live. There are some parks around the neighborhood, but you see more man-made structures everywhere. The city is packed with houses for thousands of people, roads are overflowing with cars, and there are a bunch of buildings to house all the people and their cars. 

I wanted my child to grow up with more green stuff around. Play on grass, breathe fresh air from the forest, take weekend trips to the mountains and camping. Open space lets minds be more creative. 

Rising Crime Rate

There is always crime where people are. In recent news, the crime rate in California has skyrocketed and fewer preventative measures are in place.  According to FBI Crime Data Explorer (FBI CDE), Georgia (367) had less than the national average (380.7) in Violent Crime while California (499.5) had a lot higher rate in 2022.  

I don't want to get into all the politics, but it is scary to see so many violent crimes on the local news. In reality, I do see a lot of people on the streets that seem to have drug problems. I don't feel safe raising a child in this environment.

Housing Market Situation

We've lived in the State of California for about 3 years. The housing prices have been increasing forever. It seems so out of reach to find a good house in a good neighborhood near a good school. A simple Google search returns the median house price of $843,340 in California during September 2023. The same search for Georgia returns about $358,000.

I know the "average price" is undermining the outliers and makes it difficult to see the entire picture. But, in general, the housing price in California is one of the highest in the U.S. I want to be where "affordable" houses are.

Conclusion

California is a great place to live and it has a lot to offer. It's just not for us at this time. We aren't 100% sure Georgia is going to be THE ANSWER to life. We are giving it a try. A "Try" that is so grand that we are willing to go through a massive project. I hope we enjoy it, fingers crossed!

How We Got Our Baby to Sleep Through the Night

Sleep Tight, Little One: Newborn Sleep Tips for Blissful Nights

Bringing a newborn into your life is a whirlwind of joy and love, but it's also a world of sleepless nights and tired eyes. The good news is, there are ways to help your baby (and you!) get a better night's sleep. Let's dive into some practical tips for newborn sleep in this blog.

1. Sleep Training Secrets

Sleep training is all about helping your baby develop healthy sleep habits. While there are different methods, it's essential to start gently. Here are a few tips to consider:

• Routine is key: Establish a consistent bedtime routine. It can be as simple as a warm bath, a good amount of feeding to last the night, a bedtime story, and a lullaby.

• Gradual Self-Soothing: Encourage your baby to learn to self-soothe. It's okay to give them a few moments to see if they can fall back asleep on their own. 

• Stay Consistent: Be patient and consistent with your sleep training methods. It takes time for your baby to adapt.

• Start Early: We started as early as 40 days old and it worked as a charm.

2. Safe Sleep Practices

Safety is paramount when it comes to newborn sleep. To ensure your baby sleeps soundly and securely, follow these guidelines:

• Back to Sleep: Always place your child on their back to sleep. It reduces the risk of sudden infant death syndrome (SIDS). If they grow enough to flip, they usually have built enough muscles to sleep facing down, but always be careful.

• Firm Mattress: Use a firm and flat mattress in your baby's crib or bassinet. Keep it free of soft bedding and toys. They might cause suffocation. 

• Room Sharing: It's recommended to share a room with your baby but not the same bed. Have the crib in the parents' room. Have easy access to the crib. Clear out the way. 

3. Creating a Sleep Routine

A sleep routine can work wonders for your baby's sleep patterns. Here's how to establish one:

• Consistent Timing: Try to put your baby to sleep and wake them up at the same time each day. 

       Ex) 6:00 - 6:15 PM  Bath

             6:15  - 6:30 PM Last Feeding

             6:30 - 6:40 PM Story Time (book reading)

             7:00 PM -        Sleep

• Dim the Lights: As bedtime approaches, lower the lights to signal that it's time to wind down. Babies begin to produce melatonin (a hormone that controls sleep) around 8 - 16 weeks old. Darkness signals the brain to raise the melatonin level and fall asleep. 

• White Noise: Gentle background noise, like a white noise machine, can help your baby sleep peacefully. It doesn't always work for everyone though. 

Conclusion: Sweet Dreams for Your Little One

Newborn sleep doesn't have to be a mystery. By practicing gentle sleep training, ensuring safe sleep practices, and creating a consistent sleep routine, you can help your baby get the rest they need. Remember, every baby is unique, and what works for one might not work for another. Be patient, and stay consistent, and soon, both you and your baby will enjoy peaceful nights and refreshing days. Sweet dreams!

If you want to find out about picking the best crib for your newborn, click on this link: How I Chose My Baby's First Crib

Cognitive Constructivism: What You Need to Know

Cognitive Constructivism

Continuing from the last post (Behaviorism), we will explore another popular learning theory: Cognitive Constructivism. As a reminder, there are many different learning theories, and not all of them are 100% bound to boost your child's learning. Different approaches might work better in different situations. It's not one-size-fits-all. As a parent, you need to explore a couple or multiple theories and apply what seems to work the best. 

Cognitive Constructivism bases learning on experience. A lot of toy companies, like Lego, apply this theory in making their learning aids. Let's find out why this might be the best form of teaching STEM. 

What is the Cognitive Constructivism?

Cognitive Constructivism suggests that we acquire knowledge by discovering information through doing things. The knowledge is learned when the experience is linked to the pre-existing knowledge. If we make this connection stronger by repeating the experience, we hold on the the knowledge better and longer. 

It's like a learning dots connected by lines to map out the net of knowledge. 

 

Basics of Cognitive Constructivism

• Schema: The learning dots are called schema in educational psychology. Just a word that sounds cool.
• Assimilation: Making connections to the prior knowledge. This is how most learning occurs in this approach.

What does Cognitive Constructivism look like?

When you teach someone how to throw a football, you show how to hold the ball and say "Throw it just like how you throw a baseball." He or she will try a couple times, get the feel for it, and a few more practices will enable throwing a football.

This is what the cognitive constructivism approach looks like. With a bit of demonstration (guide) and connection to their prior knowledge (throwing a baseball), they understand the basic mechanics of the new concept. 

Pedagogy

5E Lesson Plans

One of the main lesson plan types I was taught in college was the 5E lesson plan for becoming a 6 - 12 math teacher. 

• Engage
• Explore
• Explain
• Evaluate
• Extend

I was taught that this is the most effective way of teaching math and science to middle and high schoolers. This is widely adopted for schools using the Common Core Standards.

Activate prior knowledge. Throw them a question. Let them explore through hands-on activities. Provide minimum to no guidance as they "discover" the answer. Fill in the gaps. Check for understanding. Extend to further concepts. 

Lego Education

The Danish company, probably the most renowned toy company all over the globe, has built a great curriculum under their catchphrase "Learn by Play." Their philosophy lies within this learning theory. You can check out their lesson plans in 5E lesson format on their website:  Lego Education

They believe children can play and gain crucial experience with their products. It lays the basis for coding and STEAM education. If a child succeeds in building one model, they can extend to building other models too. 

Conclusion

Even at an early age, babies and toddlers assimilate their learning to what they already know. They might not have as many schemas as adults or the brides might not be as strong yet. As parents, if you guide your child to experiment with things and repeat them many times, you can help your little one to learn a lot. 

The goal of this approach is to teach them how to assimilate. If they can quickly find a connection to what they already know, they can learn anything at any time more effectively. Let THEM learn by discovering!

If you want to learn more about other learning theories, click on this link: Learning Theories

If you want to learn more about Behaviorism, click on this link: Behaviorism

Nuna Baby New Product (Level Up)

Nuna Baby Introducing a New Product

I've been a big fan of Nuna Baby products ever since my wife got pregnant. It was one of the first few brands that popped out when I was searching for a stroller. They have a wide variety of strollers for all sizes and purposes. They also have car seats, a play yard, high chairs, bouncers, and baby carriers. Nuna is most famous for its premium quality 'Nuna Pipa' Car Seats, 'Mixx Next' Stroller, and '

Trvl' stroller.

Nuna's products check most of the boxes: safety, quality, materials, durability, comfort, and convenience. The travel system (a combination of a stroller and a basket-type car seat) is the best way to go for first-time parents. You can't beat the convenience of having one tool used as a car seat and a part of a stroller. There is no need to move the baby from one place to the other!

If you are actively looking for a travel system, click on the link below to explore the options: 

Nuna Travel System

Introduction of New Product

So, I've been following their Instagram account. They posted a video hinting at a new stroller. There is no indication on their website yet. The video depicts the outlines of what seems to be a stroller with the phrase "Level Up." This video is getting a lot of attention from parents who already own some of Nuna's products. 

Nuna Instagram

Trvl Double Maybe?

The anticipation is building and the followers have been commenting on the video guessing what the new product is going to be. The most common "request" is the 'trvl' double. The 'trvl' is a smaller-sized stroller suited for traveling with a child. It features an automatic, easy fold and is very light compared to the other segments. 

If 'trvl' comes as double, meaning two seats for two children, it would add a lot more convenience for those family who travels a lot. Unfortunately, most airlines don't allow 'trvl' in the cabin as a carry-on due to the slightly large size that won't fit in the overhead compartment. Still, it's easier than traveling with a deluxe-sized stroller. 

New Demi Grow?

Demi Grow is Nuna's only double stroller. It can attach up to 2 seats on top and bottom of the stroller. It is sturdy and comfortable, thanks to the large back wheels. 

People commenting are asking for the new Demi Grow because Mixx got a new and improved version as Mixx Next.  Demi Grow was launched in 2017 and has not gotten a makeover yet. It might be the perfect timing for the Demi Grow Next in 2024. 

Conclusion

Nuna has been putting out amazing products to improve babies' and parents' lives. That is probably why so many followers are hyped up about this Instagram post. No matter what the new product is, I'm pretty sure it's a well-thought product, and I have no doubt about it. 

Waiting for the 100th Day Miracle

Everything Gets Better After the 100th Day

In Korea, there is a tradition to celebrate a newborn's 100th day from birth. A long time ago, before the medical advancement, surviving 100 days was called a miracle. Malnutrition, unsanitary practices, and lack of biological knowledge challenged the survival rate of the little ones. 

Nowadays, fortunately, a lot of newborns make it through 100 days with very little or no problems. The term 100th Day Miracle is redefined for the new parents. It's not a miracle for the babies, but a miracle for the parents. In this blog post, we will explore the changes that come about on the 100th day.

Challenges up to the 100th Day

There are challenges and struggles for the new parents from Day 1. Aside from love, happiness, satisfaction, and a bunch of indescribable feelings, caring for a baby brings fatigue, sleeplessness, stress, worries, and a bunch of other indescribable feelings that can't possibly be healthy for the parents. 

Some challenges my family experienced in the first 100 days were:

• Feeding & sleeping schedule: Babies grow fast. Their patterns change over a few days. Our daughter had 2 hours intervals between feeding, but sometimes she'd sleep for more than 2 hours. Of course, she woke up in the middle of the night because she got hungry.

• Right amount of milk: First few weeks, our daughter ate surprisingly little. Then she kept on wanting more and more right after feeding. We tried a gradual increase, but she seemed to have growth spurts every now and then. In between, she went back to the normal amount. (All that precious breast milk wasted 😢) 

• Right product at the right timing: The baby welcome gift box from places like Amazon, Walmart, Target, or Buy Buy Baby can really come in handy. We did a lot of research for baby products and thought we were ready before the birth. How arrogant of us! We learned about all the different bottle sizes, nipple sizes, and shapes babies prefer after our baby came home.  There were so many necessary, helpful items we needed to buy: a thinner swaddle for summer, natural ingredient lotions, diaper rash cream, baby cams, toys, and on and on. Caring for a baby is a lot harder without the right products.

 

• Crying baby but why?: Babies cry a lot. That's how they communicate. It's like a foreign language that you can barely interpret. Fortunately, our daughter isn't much of a cry-er. Our nephew, on the other hand, cries for hours. If the parents can't figure out why, not only the crying hurts the ears, but it also hurts their heart for not being able to connect with their child. (Note: it's not your fault. Keep trying! Sometimes it takes practice.)

• Unwashed Bottles: Being so caught up with watching the baby, we forgot to wash the bottles at times and ran out when the hungry roar began. We got so nervous and blamed ourselves for taking that 10-minute nap when we should've been doing the dishes.

The Hundredth Day Miracle

It is known that most babies settle into a pattern by the 100th day. Their growth spurts stabilize into noticeable intervals. They start to sleep at night, for a long period of time! If parents enforce a schedule, babies get used to it. They now can make eye contact, respond to your voice or appearance, laugh, and smile more. The 100th Day Miracle is here!

Parents grew their expertise in caring for their little ones. Diaper change: done. Feeding: done. Products: ready. At this point, most parents can connect with their child a lot better. The routines and habits are suited to the best practices. Parents can get some sleep at night or at least figure out a sleeping pattern to secure some dream time. I personally enjoy a lot of our daughter's wake-up laughter. We sleep in the same room. She wakes up at 7 AM every day and hangs out by herself for a while. If her parents don't come by, then she starts to make all these noises to wake them. When I half-asleep walk over to her, she gives me the brightest smile and laughs.  

Conclusion

These words might keep you going in the first 100 days:

• Is this why we had a baby? YES, that is exactly why.
• Everybody has gone through this path. I can get through this path. This is how I become a father.
• Everything is alright. I'm on the right path. 
• It will pass. The 100th-day miracle IS coming!

Even though it might be a tough time physically, mentally, and emotionally, when I look back, every single moment was so precious. I'm very glad that our baby is healthy and growing fast. Enjoy the ride. It's worth it!

How I Chose My Baby's First Crib

Picking the Best Baby Crib

From day one, babies sleep a lot. That's what they need to do. As parents, we need to prepare the one piece of furniture that they spend the majority of time for a couple of months. A crib, or a baby bed, is an essential part of the nursery room for newborns. In this blog post, I will share my thought process on finding the perfect baby crib for my child.

Where to Find Them

There are quite a few places where you can find cribs. As important as it is, a lot of manufacturers are in the market.

• Delta Children (online)
• Ikea
• Target
• Pottery Barns Kids
• Crate and Barrel

Most of the furniture brands carry some pieces for babies. Some premium brands are rarely on display, but I was able to find some at Nordstrom, ones like Nestig Wave Crib. 

What to Consider

Here are some key points to consider:

• What material are you looking for?
• What's the budget?
• Are you looking for a crib that can turn into a toddler bed?
• Are you looking to buy a bundle with other pieces of furniture?
• Is there a theme in your nursery room?

Notice there is no question about safety. Any baby crib sold in the U.S. needs to pass the safety tests. We still need to practice safety caution in using the crib, but the furniture themselves are built with safety standards. For more information about safety tips, click on this link: 

Crib Safety Tips.

Parts of the crib you need to purchase together:

• Mattress
• Mattress protector
• Mattress sheets

A baby's mattress needs to be firm to prevent suffocation and to support the baby's back. They don't have enough muscles to pull themselves together yet. 

Sometimes, diapers fail. Infants throw up a lot. When they get to the 4-5th month mark, they start drooling all over the place. You will need a mattress protector that's water-resistant. 

For the same reason, you will need multiple mattress covers. Get the soft cotton ones for your baby's soft skin. 

Budgeting

Now that you have an idea of what to look for, you need to fit it into your budget. To be honest, when I saw the cribs in person, I couldn't tell much of the difference in functionality. Differences were in the quality of the finish, details in materials, or how nice they looked. If you are having the first child, you might want to look into the bundles from websites like Delta Children. They have a great selection of nice-looking furniture. We found the 6-piece set of a crib, dresser with a changing pad, glider (the rocking chair for feeding), mattress, mattress protector, and sheets at a great price. They have a variety of styles and colors to choose from. Take a look before you start visiting the offline stores to get the feel of what you want.

Conclusion

Shopping for your baby is always exciting. Make sure to plan ahead and spend some time looking at different options. Don't wait until the last minute. Some furniture will need assembly and it might be challenging if your wife is at the hospital about to deliver a baby. 

You want to get a safe, durable, and comfortable crib for your newborn. In terms of economics, try to find a nursery set to slice off some cost. The cribs are where your infants spend most of their time for a while. Their focus is on growing and they do it by sleeping. Let's give our precious little ones a cozy, quality sleeping environment.

If you are wondering what other things need to be prepared before you baby gets home, click on the link below:

Essential Furniture for Your Newborn